Cast your anxiety on him
I have a fear of myself! I don't mean that I pass a shop window, see a reflection of myself and jump a mile. No, I actually fear and loathe myself… at times. At times it gets so bad I have to withdraw into myself. I get moody and depressed, and all I think about is how much I hate myself.
I fear this part of my life so much I have even named it: Mr. Self-Loathing or Mr. Self-Doubt.
Now, I used to watch out for him every day. Analyze the minutiae of my life. Just to head him off at the pass. I couldn't trust anyone with this and for well over twenty years, certainly until I was in my early 40's, I kept it to myself. The thing is, by doing what I was doing, I never handed over the pain or the problem to anyone.
When a good friend recognized what I was doing to myself, he taught me a new approach. First try and let go of all the fears you have every day about life. Separate the things you can change and affect from the things you have no control over whatsoever. He taught me to recognize the triggers, well in advance. Instead of worrying about the fears, learn to work with them. Steer into the skid, as they say.
Learn to trust God, give him the problems. Learn to open up to others.
Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you" 1 Peter 5:7 [NIV]
Since I started using these techniques, my fear of Mr. Self-Loathing and Mr Self-Doubt has reduced, as has the amount of time they spend with me. I still have attacks of crippling depression, but because I have trusted God and understand the causes of the illness, I can cope with it much better. Instead of battling it, I embrace it.
Seriously if you have problems with mental health, please talk to somebody. Let them know what you are going through. Chances are they have been through it or are going through it and can empathise. Or call the Samaritans:
www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us
Steve Fogo
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