[Monday's Devotional] - Fathers and Daughters

Many people in our church were challenged by Paul Oxley’s novel perspective on the story of Laban, Jacob, Leah and Rachel at our recent church weekend at home. It has inspired some reflections on family relationships from the later chapters of Genesis.

You may remember the story from Genesis 29 where Jacob had to work seven years to gain his chosen bride, Rachel, but was duped into accepting her less desirable sister and then had to work a further seven years to gain Rachel.

Laban loved both his daughters and wanted the best for both of them – he even resorted to underhand means so that the disadvantaged daughter had access to the same benefits as the beautiful and talented one.

Favouring one child over another causes untold problems in families (as Laban will find out) and can lead to decades of emotional trauma in the child who felt less loved.  Many parents claim they treat their children equally, for example, making sure the cost of Christmas presents balances out or giving them all the opportunity to learn a musical instrument. But children have different personalities, talents, likes and dislikes, parents often over the course of the years face the dilemma – should we be “fair” or should we treat or children as individuals giving more time or money or help as we deem necessary?

As far as St. Paul is concerned, parents have been given their role by God. His advice is:

Children, obey your parents in the Lord [that is, accept their guidance and discipline as His representatives], for this is right [for obedience teaches wisdom and self-discipline].  Honour [esteem, value as precious] your father and your mother [and be respectful to them]—this is the first commandment with a promise—   so that it may be well with you, and that you may have a long life on the earth.

Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to the point of resentment with demands that are trivial or unreasonable or humiliating or abusive; nor by showing favouritism or indifference to any of them], but bring them up [tenderly, with lovingkindness] in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:1-4 [Amplified Bible]

If you are a parent, pray for your relationship with your children. If you are not, a family you know with children would value your prayers.

 

Mairi Mowbray